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:::::trigger warnings::::::  loss mentioned

One of my biggest annoyances in life is when random strangers, hell even people I know,  tell me to “smile”. As if my face is too pitiful to gaze upon when my mouth is not stretched wide revealing a sea of porcelain white teeth.
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The day I found out the twins I was carrying, had died inside me, I left work and headed straight to a liquor store. With mascara streaks down my cheeks, I placed a bottle of vodka on the counter and pulled out my money. Much to my surprise the man behind the counter told me, “you’re too pretty to not smile, you should smile more”. Dumbfounded, I just said “ok.” Who the hell was this guy to tell me to smile?! He knew nothing of my life, of me, or the devastating news I had just received, yet he felt compelled to tell me to smile, to judge me.
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When we walk through this life, do we see people for who they are, Flawed and emotional creatures? Or, do we see them only from our own perspective? Perspectives that are colored by our own individual experiences and molded by our own abilities to handle life in a way that makes our worldly experience unique. Why can’t we just leave ourselves out of the equation? Just accept that not everything is rosy for everyone?
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I write this because, yet again, I have miscarried another little babe. A baby who was planned for, who was wanted, who was dreamt of.  Another baby I will never hold, cuddle, worry about, or love on…….

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I didn’t head straight for the liquor store when I heard the news….. instead I saved myself the judging glances, and had that bottle waiting at home as this miscarriage wasn’t a big surprise.

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Please be careful with your judgements of others. Instead, just assume that you have no idea what journey they are on, and love them for the human-beings that they are… just like you….Flawed and emotional….. and sometimes without a smile to give.